Anyone who works with youth (urban or otherwise) knows that conflicts can often erupt. The signs and symptoms vary, but one minute things can seem to be going smoothly, and the next minute, kids will be yelling at one another, threatening, or even throwing punches.
A good youth worker becomes adept at seeing the warning signs before things get too hot. A good youth worker also becomes skilled at redirecting teens away from conflict or helping lead them to a healthy resolution before things explode. Keeping the peace is an important aspect of being a good youth worker.
But a great youth worker learns how and when to let things ignite (without getting too far out of control - or putting anyone at risk) so that deeper lessons can be learned and deeper healing can take place. I'm not sure if I or any of my staff are really there, yet. Thankfully, there are times when God allows circumstances to happen that way so that He can do that deeper work.
Nina, who works with our Lancaster girls, shared a story recently from the last girls weekend at camp:
Several girls were attending camp for the first time, and things were not going very smoothly. Lots of conflict and tension. After things flared up once again, Nina and the girls sat down to work things out and talk things through. She noticed that the girls seemed to be paying attention and started to show different attitudes...
Before leaving for home at the end of the weekend, they took some time to pray, and one of the girls who was in the middle of all the conflict offered to pray. After thanking God for the chance to come to camp and get out of the city and to meet new friends, she then went on to thank God "for all the drama we went through this weekend, because it gave me a chance to get things off of my chest and talk about the stuff I would usually just hold inside."
Sometimes God uses conflict to bring us to the place He wants us to be... a place of honesty and realness... so that He can meet us there.
It can be a challenge to allow those moments to take place when so often we are tempted to keep the peace... but I think Jesus said, "Blessed are the peacemakers" not "Blessed are the peacekeepers."
Nina, whether it was your preference or not, thanks for being a "peacemaker."
- Jack Crowley, Teen Haven
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