As I sit and reflect at the end of a hard day a fresh wave of unworthiness washes over me. How did this dysfunctional, drug addicted-loser end up being used by the Lord to change lives?
I recall the early days of my recovery as I slinked into Bible College filled with shame over a lifetime of sleazy acts that would always have to be stated in any honest recounting of my past. In College, I walked the halls with some who had never tasted alcohol and were still virgins. I felt filthy in their presence. My shame haunted me throughout College and Seminary. I could hardly look my Professors in the eye.
As an attempt to help me discover the Lord’s plan for me, one of my Professors recommended that I try volunteering at the local rescue mission. I was amazed at what I found. In ten minutes of sharing my history with a man at the mission I could feel my shame being lifted as my story provided him hope. I was convinced in an instant that this was where I would be serving the Lord.
Since Seminary I have found that, in ministry, the Lord continues to use my brokenness far more than he uses my training. All I have to do to be effective is: be honest about my sinfulness!
- Aaron Eggers, Men’s Ministries
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